Archive for the ‘Michael Jackson’ category

Sammy Sosa Turns White

November 12th, 2009
It seems another side effect of steroids is turning a sickly white

It seems another side effect of steroids is turning a sickly white

What happens when a retired multi-millionaire athlete has too much time on his hands? He decides to go MJ and bleach himself white.

Were guessing Sammy was looking for a change and decided to tone down his “Dominicaness” and turn up the Weirdo vibe.

The look on his wife’s face says it all, apparently once you go black, you can go back.

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Michael Jackson’s Parents Fight Over His Money

November 10th, 2009
"I'm bout my money you see, I'm a P-I-M-P"

"I'm bout my money you see, I'm a P-I-M-P"

MJ’s parents are squabbling in court over who will be the executor of Jackson’s will.

It’s nice to see that Joe Jackson is close to getting his hoofs on Michaels money. After all it was his beatings, mental torture and emotional neglect that made MJ the socially awkward and highly successful sideshow he was.

I guess there’s 3 certainties in life if your Michael: death, taxes and family looting your estate.

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This Is It?… Not A Chance!

October 28th, 2009
Genius = making a movie from security footage

Genius = making a movie from security footage

The Michael Jackson documentary ‘This is it’, is set for release on Friday. The marketing behind the movie is billing it as a 2 week only event.

It’s hard to believe a studio would only exploit MJs death for 2 weeks, this movie will be extended and re-extend more than Beyonce’s weave.

Then comes the DVD release, then the DVD re-release which will be billed as the ‘resurrection edition’, followed by the ‘white glove edition’, which will have commentary by his chimp bubbles.

This movie will produce the kind of cash flow that could get neverland opened again.

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Stupid Celebrity Baby Names

October 16th, 2009
"Apple your going to have a little brother named Sauce"

"Apple your going to have a little brother named Sauce"

Creativity and originality are what make many artists successful. Unfortunately some stars take it to far.

These are the unfortunate 5 who’s parents have signed them up for years of torment, beatings and ridicule:

  1. Apple – Gwyneth Paltrow & Chris Martin
    • Were assuming they used the dictionary to pick a name, started with A, got tired and settled on Apple.
  2. Bronx Mowgli – Pete Wentz & Ashlee Simpson
    • Ive been to this restaurant, its in Jamaica Queens NYC.
  3. Suri – Tom Cruise & Katie Homles
    • Were guessing this is a planet Scientologists believe in.
  4. Blanket – Michael Jackson & unknown
    • The least of this child’s problems will be its name.
  5. Jayden- Britney Spears & Kevin Federline
    • Very pretty girls name, unfortunately they have 2 sons.
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